The Handmaid's Tale

If you weren't aware, we're in the midst of the streaming wars, where every cable channel and streaming company on the planet is racing to gain market share and viewership for their own streaming service. It's an exciting time that's producing some very memorable content, and today, I'm here to rank em!


Disclaimer

These are my opinions. Not that of Celebrity Page, my fellow writers at Celebrity Page, just me. And, if you disagree with me, remember, I don't really know anything. This is just one guy's opinion, and it should be kept that way.

There is also no hate towards any of these services. I love them all, I love what they have to offer, and I have been a happy subscriber of all nine at one point or another. If any of you want to give me an hour long comedy special, please don't let this list affect your decision making. But I'm a ranker, this is what I do.

9. Apple TV+

So, Apple getting into the streaming world was a surprise to everyone, but they are genuinely one of the strongest services out there. The key to streaming success, in my opinion, especially when you're starting with a blank slate like Apple was, is to have really good original content that makes non-subscribers jealous that they can't watch.

For example, Wolfwalkers was one of the best movies I've ever seen. Ted Lasso was a massive success, making the award show rounds as we speak, and The Morning Show was an extremely strong start.

The problem? They're still a baby streamer, and they don't have the history of their fellow baby streamers to support a massive library of content. What they do have is very good, but they need more time to develop.

8. Peacock

This really isn't fair to Peacock, because it's a great service. It's not that expensive at $5 a month, and it has some surprises in there aside from NBC programming that make it well worth that price point. It's got The Office, Parks and Rec, Superstore, some of my favorite shows of all time.

The problem is that if we're looking at potential, Peacock is hindered by the fact that its only source of original content is a single network. It's not the mass gathering of content that a Hulu or a Netflix is, it's more of an add on to your streaming package so you can retain your old favorites.

There's nothing wrong with Peacock, like I said, it's just really what it is, a streamer for a single network, whereas everything else we're about to list is a massive conglomerate of entertainment.

7. Prime Video

Prime Video has been a bit of a casualty of the streaming wars. The emergence of new streamers has almost left them as a forgotten gem of sorts, but don't count them out.

They aren't going to lose subscriber rates, because it's free with Amazon Prime, and who doesn't have Amazon Prime, and their original series are some of the best out there. They also have a very impressive catalogue of indie movies that a film major like myself can really get behind.

But, overall, and this has always been the biggest positive and negative about Prime Video, is that so much of their streaming catalogue is for rent. Very little is actually included with Prime outside of their original series. This means that if you really want to watch something, it'll be on Prime Video, but it also means you have to pay for it. So, kind of a wash.


6. Discovery+

Discovery+ is awesome. The Food Network, Discovery Channel, TLC, it's all right there for you to enjoy. I have zero complaints about it, and as a Food Network fanatic, it's a big part of my everyday routine.

Where it falls flat is that you can't open Discovery+ and say to yourself "what do I want to watch?" unless all you watch is their programming. You don't go on Discovery+ to find something to watch, you go on it because you want to watch something.

That may not make a ton of sense, but what I mean is that it doesn't have content variety, it has their niche. I love their niche, but as far as diversity of content, I need to rank it lower.

5. Paramount+

What a start. We all know Paramount has everything, but dude, they have everything.

You want Spongebob? Not only do they have the whole cartoon series, they have a brand new movie exclusive to the platform. Want late night? They've got Colbert, Corden, and Trevor Noah. Want comedy? They own Comedy Central. Want drama? They own CBS, and every movie Paramount has ever made, which is every movie ever made.

A+ service. Nailed it. The only reason it isn't higher is how young it is.

4. Netflix

Here she is, Ol' Reliable. Netflix, however, has gone from the only streaming service to one in a muddled pile of a billion. The problem is, with the introduction of all these new services, Netflix lost a lot of their acquired content, making them lean on their original series.

The good news is, their original series are amazing. The Queen's Gambit, Bridgerton, and Stranger Things, among a billion other shows, is must see television. Their cooking shows, especially Ugly Delicious, is some of the best in the game. Their movies are groundbreaking and award winning. And, they remain the primo spot for stand up comedy. No matter how much money they make, no comedian is staying up at night dreaming about a Hulu special.

Netflix is like your best friend. Even if you go out, make other friends, maybe grow apart for a while, you can always come back like nothing ever happened. It's still the same old Netflix, and you still have that same love.

3. Disney+

Disney+ stormed into the game and made themselves a must subscribe immediately. Especially if you're a nerd like me. Owning Star Wars, Marvel, and 90% of my childhood goes a long way. And their desire to continue expanding their universes with must see television like Wandavision and The Mandalorian makes it all the better.

Incredible.

2. HBO Max

HBO Max has played the streaming game better than almost anyone. Disney+ might have Marvel, but they have DC. Every Warner Bros movie this year is being joint released through the platform. Plus, I mean, it's still HBO. They've got some of the most acclaimed shows ever.

It's my favorite thing to come out of the streaming wars.

1. Hulu

I love Hulu. What they did, that's so brilliant, is they've used add on packages to replicate real TV. You don't need cable if you have Hulu, because they have live sports, something no one else can say. You get to move into the future while keeping the parts of cable you really love.

Plus, with all their add on packages, you can watch virtually anything there. 90% of the time, if you want to watch something, it's on Hulu. Their platform is where they're best, and their platform is incredible.

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